Do you like people who like sandwiches? Do you like people who like dead sandwiches? Do you like people that like dead sandwiches that have feelings and talk to you about when your mom used to make her pancakes? If so then this podcast is for you! Eldar: Warhammer 40K's sandwich eating elves are on a quest to talk to their dead moms through the portent of sandwiches as the quest for the perfect pumpkin pancake recipe. But instead of that perfect pumpkin pancake they find their past! But not really. But kinda, but not really, but.... no, they do. Who cares. It is elves. Dave and Jon delve deep into the Ghost Warrior book and spoil the shit out of it for you. So put on that Guardians of the Galaxy T-Shirt you have had for years with that one crusty spot around your lower abdomin that doesn't seem to come off no matter how many times you wash it, mix yourself a tall tasty glass of what ever frozen things are in the freezer, sit back and absorb the warm scandalous tones of Mob Rules!
What do 80's action heroes and Imperial Hives Cities have in common? That is for you to decide. See how nice we are? You are empowered now to write your own answers. We trust you.
This episode we delve into what it is like to live in a Hive city, the ins the outs and the unfortunate who gets turned into a toaster servitor. Then, we get into a 1980's action style 40K hero write up, taking vintage heroes and turning them into grim dark super heroes. Do you have somebody in mind?
Lets get into it. Put on your favorite indi-comic T-shirt from the 1990's with the moth bite holes along the waste line, mix up a nice tall tasty smoothy with the left over apples from that pie you made a few weeks ago, sit back and bask in the warm sounds of Mob Rules!
Who has time to read when social media needs to be updated 18 times a day, the kids need to be walked, the dog needs to do homework and the Raiders in the wasteland need to be murderized? For those of us who wish they had the time but don't, the Mob Rules crew brings you the Carrion Throne in it it's entire glory, each twist of fate, each untold truth so you do not have to turn a page. For those of you who have read it, this is your chance to relive your favorite moments with Crowl, Neva-Jeff, Spinoza and the whole Carrion Throne cast as we explore the story.
Put on your favorite Christmas sweater vest your old roomate made for you a few years ago, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of arguably expired Pumpkin flavored egg nog, sit back and titillate your mind with the enigmatic sounds of Mob Rules!
What do tiger stripes, quartered paint schemes and hands with glory holes have in common? No, it was not that Volkswagen Beetle you had in college. No, it was not the 1980's.... okay, maybe it kinda was the 1980's. The answer I was looking for was 'The Badab Wars." There is a lot of lore packed into this confrontation and a war that, even though it was written in the 1980's, is actually a pretty recent war in the scope of the 40K timeline. But who cares about that? We are just here for the dick jokes!
So, go pick out that shirt with the weird stain around the crotch that won't come out and you can't stop picking at as it slowly deteriorates the fabric, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of Pumpkin spice egg nog and bask in the NSFW sounds of Mob Rules!
Do you ever sit on your futon that you inhereted from the previous renter, staring out the window with those streaks that you can't get rid of no matter what you do and just think to yourself "why aren't there female space marines?" Of course not, because that is a dumb question, instead you thought "how do I find the female characters in the lore?" Thankfully we found the answer, and that was twitter! Thank you twitter. The lads mashed their brain boxes together to wrangle the ladies, mechanicus/um and get you all the news on ShadeSpire so that you didn't have to! Okay, that is a crap explanation, you really want to dredge it up for yourself, but I needed a good ending to that sentence and wasn't committed to rewriting the first 2/3s. Sorry.
Anyway, it is time to pour yourself a tall tasty mug of coffee, mix in some sugar free non-dairy creamer you accidentally picked up when you meant to buy sugary creamer, plop some barely expired cream cups in it, put on your favorite Millennium Falcon t-shirt with periwinkle paint splotches you can't explain and indulge in the super saturated sexy sounds of Mob Rules!
Long ago, I mean, long away, er, in the far future? Okay, that one. In the far future, in a land far away... hmmm, can I use "far" twice in once sentence? Seems a little weird, not too weird, but a little. Anyway, in the far future in a land far away on a planet covered in excess, there lived a family, much like your's or mine, rich beyond belief, running a solar system, each member plotting the demise of one another for control and fostering a mechanical, cloned abomination to succeed the throne, and everything continued on until a rag tag band of misfits in a Baneblade arrived. BOOK REVIEW TIME!!!! Been long awaited but we delve into Shadow Sword by Guy Haley and diznam, it is good!
So don your compact foam T'au cosplay suit, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of instant ice coffee and sit back and indulge in the rock hard sounds of Mob Rules!
Are you getting that impression that GW stealth released a new army, the Imperial Guard? Thanks to investigative journalism and four sets of keen eyes, we have uncovered the truth, that in fact the Imperial Guard go way back to the dawn of 40K!!! Thats right. In today's episode we uncover the truth about the guard, where they come from, why GW has been so secretive about them and what we see the future looking like for this undercover organization.
So put on your mom's favorite nightgown that she made 23 years ago, pour yourself a tall tasty glass of Metamucil, sit back and endulge in the ever informative sounds of Mob Rules!
The episode we break down the functions of a polynomial, the effects of a black crusade and what it means to be a gerbil in Hollywood. One of those things is true. Can you find the true statement? No calculators, only scratch paper now. We also talk about what happened to Phil and what the past 30 years have been like in the realm of 40k.
All that and not much else on MOB RULES!
In our first ever episode on Canadian monetary policy, Jon and Ted delve deep into the financial workings of the Canadian petrol industry. Well, sorta. Anecdotally through reference to once buying gas in the Yukon. That is pretty much the same as an in-depth look at monetary policy, right? Thankfully we have a deeper subject: PRIMARIS MARINES!!!!!! The lore, the tabletop roles, etc. Then we go into what it is to be older in our hobby, should we spend money or time? What tools do we employ to keep the flame burning. So, go to the liquor cabinet, pour yourself a nice tall tasty pint of Everclear, put on your favorite jeans with the twin holes between the crotch (remember to bring a blanket) and bask in the rotten tones of Mob Rules!
As Phil gets ready to head down the Al-Can we give him a bit of a handjob and courage him to talk about his beloved Dark Angels, the history, the organization, the why and how they became traitors. But, shhhhh, don't tell him, he is still in denial. We also go into the changing rule set, our favorite model kits and thank a fan for his home-made Jeff the Custodes.
So pour a medium glass of weeks old flat root beer, plop a couple scoops of generic brand ice cream, put on your tech conference hoodie you got 4 years ago, sit back and bask in the awesome sounds of Mob Rules.
the 1 Hour a Night facebook group was mentioned as hosting the Dark Imperium competition was it as the Warhammer 40000 page instead.Our Apologies to Alexander Good who ran the event.
Goge Vandire. What do you know about Goge Vandire and his brother Doge? Yeah, that is what I thought, not much. Lets get into it: he was a jerk, probably had a lil borderline personality issues, loved young girls, older girls too, and cheated on his taxes. Kind of a jerk really. BUT, he was an important jerk who was instrumental in creating the empire we all know and love... unless you don't love it, then it is the empire you know and do not love. Ya see? So, lets get into some Warhammer 40,000 lore with the Age of Apostasy!
Ever find yourself basking in the warm glow of the smog hanging over your hive world illuminated by the manufactorum over the ridge of spires while sipping that exotic recaf wondering to yourself how you got so lucky in your grim dark world just to have your feelings wrenched from your bliss unexpectantly, twisted sideways, the color of life swell and shudder turning quickly into darkness as you are left an empty husk of a human barely able to perform basic natural functions? If so thank an assassin! Chances are you were an unsanctioned psyker and the emperor is better off now. But don't just stop there, you memories of a life lost isn't the focus of this podcast, the focus is on the assassins from seven of the 12 temples as well as some other folks that like to play death dealer on their off hours. So go down to your local quickie mart, grab yourself a tall tasty recycled plastic bottle of Faygo, put on your favorite hip hop hoodie and bundle up with the boombastic sounds of Mob Rules!
The lads delve into the history of perhaps the most polarizing Space Marines chapter: the Ultramarines. In wa way the history of the history of the Space Marines is the History of the Ultramarines more so than any other chapter whether you love them or hate them. In a way the thing that makes them so interesting isn't who they are but the reaction towards them both in game and out.
Also this episode the eBay Price is Right is back! So pony up to the bar, order yourself a nice tasty glass of room-temperature Tang, haphazardly apply some torn pieces of napkin to your facial stubble and soak in the noxious sounds of Mob Rules!
There are times like these in our lives, where change, change takes us down that uncomfortable path, removes the familiar and and gives us uncertainty. We came to know 7th edition, it was our friend, our cousin, our loved one, 7th meant a lot of things to us. We escaped into her bosom when the dishes need be washed, a presentation in school had us stressed out, our partner wanted to talk to us about why you watch gory moves. 7th was our mistress, and at other times everything else became the mistress as 7th took first string. In those nights, when 7th had your full attention, and you made notes to yourself, when you had that aha moment seeing that by putting a techmarine on bike in your devastator squad and it conferred relentless to the rest of the lads, or when you realized that if the Iron Hands Librarian took Gorgon’s Chains, rolled endurance on their psychic power and pulled an extra plus one on their warlord trait you could effectively have a one plus feel no pain. Moments like that made you feel special, as though you looked into the heart of the universe and found that little secret, that leg up that nobody else knew about it made you feel like a king for a night. Or, maybe it was that day when you discovered that a bubble affect went off inside your rhino happy to think that you gave your transport a five up invulnerable save, your opponent disagreed, the two of you couldn’t find the specific rule so you rolled off on it and won. A week later you saw in a forum that the model is considered to be “removed form the table when embarked in the transport” and could not cast their bubble unless otherwise stated and you were crushed. We look at these things, a series of push and pull and we think “that is a bunch of crap! How dare GW ruin my army, I am never playing again” and the following week we are back down at our friend’s house with another list trying to avoid admitting that we were wrong all the while enjoying the game. These events, the push and pull that remind us of our love. The clerk at the fast food drive through doesn’t give us that push pull, they do not cause us to pause and think, they operate, we exchange, we eat we poop and we move on unfazed. But it is these rules, these models that cause us to debate whether or not Centurians are fluffy or a cheap shot at more money, months later as we try to figure out how we could magnetize their weapons and what they would look like as Obliterators. The love made 7th edition matter, and even though 7th edition passes today she will always matter.
Remember, this is not about death, but a life well lived.
Shadows blot out the land as the destroyer hive blots out the already defuse sun. Shadows of titans bringing death and stretch stretch across the land. Today the Death Guard arrive to play you a song. Awwwwww, they are so cute! Don’t you want to just pick them up and cuddle them and kiss them and share their pox? I do! In this episode we delve into the squishy squeezyness of the 14th Legion and succumb to the Nurgle’s gifts. So wrap yourself up in your favorite diseased blanket, put on those rotten bunny slippers, pour yourself a nice tasty glass of recently expired Kern’s Nectar and indulge in the postulant sounds of Mob Rules!
The lads did it, they finally finished the Beast Arises series and delivered on the fourth quarter review. Find out what happens to the beast, Koorland, Thane, Bohemond, Vangorich as well as the rest of the High Lords of Terra. It all plays out right before your ear balls! So make sure to put on your favorite pizza stained Mob Rules t-shirt, your "Go Mork" foam finger, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of Apricot nectar and indulge in the super sexy sounds of Mob Rules, one step beyond!
In today's history lesson we look at the multiple wars of Armageddon, the personalities that made history, the community art that Chaos makes in it's down time, movies that lead up to collapse and the wars still yet to come. We also talk about how we see 8th edition panning out and where we have come from as fans. All that and not much else on episode 49 of MOB RULES!
The storm came, the storm tussled and the storm left, and we are all left to sort through the carnage left by Chaos. How did it end? What comes next? As we figure this all out we went back in time to experience a re-release of things already experienced in Shadow War Armageddon! So sit back, get yourself a tall tasty glass of vanilla chai flavored almond milk, put on your favorite onsie that has been stretched to fit you 35 years later and indulge in the ever informative sounds of Mob Rules!
On a dark, cold clear night the anxious traveler lifted his lightly packed and unfamiliar bags and cautiously walked them down the icy driveway to a Subraru of questionable condition. A reunion of spirit awaited over five thousand miles away.
ADEPTICON 2017!!!! Swag Bags, board games, fellow podcasters, Games Workshop staff, out of print models being hawked on swap meet tables, this is it, the Mecca of Gaming Nerd.
So go pour yourself a tall tasty glass of continental breakfast coffee, butter up a piece of continental breakfast toast and relax to the sporadic diatribes of Mob Rules!
I love gold! I mean, I was paraphrasing, I don't really care for it. Maybe I wasn't paraphrasing but satyrising the custodes. Lets bust into some custodes lore and figure out where these guys came from. That is about. Get your lemonade, your ragged blanket and bath in the creamy sounds of Mob Rules, one step beyond!
Remember back in the day, when you used to pretend that you and your friend were breaking into the enemy base, beating up the villainous generic troopers, saving the attractive slave women as they passionately thank you? Because of these memories of unrealistic and objectified scenarios we bring you an episode dedicated to the weapons of 40K, past, present and future. What does this have to do with saving slave women with your friend? I don’t know, it was just a memory I had that popped up in this associative game. So dig through your closet for that old hoody from the tech conference you attended 4 years ago, mix up a class of Crystal Lite and indulge your senses in the low-filling sound of Mob Rules, one step beyond!
Home Improvement Eldar edition, featuring Chaos, Chaos, Chaos, harlequins, confused space elves and more leather boys than you can shake a squig at. We bring you up to date on what is happening in the Gathering Storm series. Se take your decadent but on over to the kitchen, make yourself a nice dagwood, wrap yourself in the finest biker boy leathers and bask in the tall tales of a broken craftworld on Mob Rules.
Rewritten and remaster, episode 43 hits your dinner plate with that satisfying "surplooof" that can only mean mom made spaghetti. Mmm mmm good. This episode, Dave Singer of Frontline Gaming Twitch fame joins the boys for all the recaps. Yes, many recaps. Peep this shiz and makey your tum tumm happy. So get up, make yourself some gluten free toaster waffles smothered in imitation maple syrup and freeze dried blue berries, drape yourself in your beloved tentacle covered Snuggy and bask in those luscious tones of Mob Rules! One step beyond.
It is not the end times, just the change times. Does that make sense? No? Okay, remember that time when you were used to the fat pencils in school and somebody handed you a thin #2? You got made and smashed it on the desk and shewed off the eraser? It didn't taste very good did it? But then you found that your motor dextarity had corrected and the smaller pencils were much better tuned to your aptitude. Then you found pens and it was amazing! You changed. Yes, even though you are a miniature wargamer, you too can change and adapt. What does this have to do with today's podcast? Who cares, just pour yoruself a tall tasty glass of Nos, snuggle into that dingy Fallout Vault hoodie and tune in to the soft sexy tones of Mob Rules!
On the menu today: Red Velvet Oreo Cheese Cake cookies and sodas.
Thinking about picking up the Imperial Agents book? We go down down down and the flames go higher. We did the research so you do not have to, now come, learn absolutely nothing and buy it anyway. So pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of mixed fruit smoothe, put on your thrift store bathrobe, grab a can of your favorite Crisco shortening and listen to the smooth audio stain of Mob Rules.
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