Dave and Jon are joined by a new third chair, and talk about the future of Mob Rules, how Dave beats Jon at 40k and all the new hotness from Warhammerfest.
Title Track - "What You Want (version 2)" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
Outro - "Crunk Knight" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License
In a distant land far far away, surrounded by giant cheeseburgers, round abouts and the Queen's hairy va-jay-jay, a lone Alaskan found himself alienated, confused and without a large truck to tell him he was okay. But through his confusion he learned about himself, his meaning and found love in that same va-jay-jay. Now, Dave is back to tell you all about it.
So, put on that favorite sock your granpa handed down to you the night he passed away, pour yourself a tall tasty glass of water you filtered after putting up with the sediment in the water for months after the line broke and bask in the dulcet tones of Mob Rules
It was a dark and stormy night, the recaf maker was on the fritz and the boiler was offline awaiting parts. As you stumbled into the kitchen to see if you could find some calming tea to help calm your nerves from a tense day at the foundry the sound of glass hitting the floor in the living room broke your stride. Taking a step backwards to get a view of what happened you see three shadowed figures standing in your living room in a small circle staring at one another and at the broken glass. "Shit." I hope the heretic didn't hear that." "He isn't a heretic, he is clearly a xenos sympathizer and this is our jurisdiction." "Not at all, he is clearly a psychic and this is firmly within our jurisdiction." "Excuse me sir, but I was here first and he is a heretic. If you would both kindly leave so that I might dispatch him I would greatly appreciate it." "No, SIR, this is Not a case of simply heresy, he is a witch and needs to repent before death."
Your mouth moved faster than your brain as you heard your words form: "What? 'Dispatch' me? You are mad!"
"First one to draw gets to claim him...."
Even in the inquisition, nobody an agree on projects.
It has been a long hard road but Adepticon is behind us, memories were shared, grievances aired and more MDF than one should ever eat was eaten. It was a thing. But lets look forward, with LVO and AdeptiCon behind us, what does this mean for the tournament scene? Meta shifts? Points adjustments? Who knows. Either way it is episode 72, so put on your favorite Mob Rules t-shirt with the blood stains from when your puppy bit you and one of her puppy teeth fell out, pour yourself a tall tasty glass of rubbing alcohol and bask in the intoxicating sounds of Mob Rules!
The guys are back and with Ted preparing for Adepticon, we talk about how to maximize the convention experience. If that wasn't enough, there's more! Dave told us all about his "Hobby Essentials", but do Jon and Ted agree? We talk about what each of our can't miss hobby tools are.
In a galaxy far far away many millions of years in the... past? the Necrontyr were birthed. With an intense desire for Disco and coke the Necronotyr lived short but bright lives. With a desire for more longevity they strode out to find meaning and zen but instead found mass amounts of dick heads bent on taking their coke money. Now we have the Necron, so our story goes.
So put on that poncho that used to be the dog blanket you kept in the back of your hair-crusted Subaru, mix yourself up a tall tasty glass of various things you found in the freezer as well as some ginger and relax to the sultry tones of Mob Rules!
It is that time of the every-other-week again! Mob Rules bringing the speaker noise to your ear holes. How has it been this long without talking about the sister of battle? Well, we are quickly plugging that gap in the dam. Plug! We also go into the custodes a little bit and talk about our favorite pasta... I think. Maybe we didn't Oh well. Either way, sooooo, go ahead and get that your favorite BBQ rib bib on from that vacation to years ago to see your cousin Hank in Alabama, mix yourself up a nice talk tasty glass of wheat grass smoothie and relax in the warm, nurturing sounds of Mob Rules.
Late nights and dirty minds bring us the 69th installment of Mob Rules. Danny steps in for Jon as we hit up Studio D (or is it Studio A.5?) and talk about the dirty Emperor's Children Legion/Chapter/Group/what ever. But that is not all, what happens when you get packed into a room at LVO, you drink too much liquored up Slurpee and eat chicken wings, and who in the Hell is Nic? So, take a moment, brush the popcorn crumbs off of your favorite dog blanket you use when you are too lazy to get a person blanket out of the closet, pour yourself a nice talk tasty glass of instant Hawaiian punch and bask in the melodic sounds of Mob Rules!
This aint no regular mainstream 40K podcast, this is an elite, no GMO, specially harvested on ethically maintained farm kinda hipster podcast. Those other podcasts may want to shovel you artificial pesticides and mainstream chapter lore, but not us, we give you the obscure indy shit that nobody else talks about. Thats right. Feel like a boss when you start dropping names like the Space Sharks, Flame Hawks and Rainbow Warriors in casual conversation.
So put on your favorites pair of dark rimmed glasses, pour yourself a stein of your favorite micro brew and bask in the elitist sounds of Mob Rules!
Ever find youself really excited that your daughter aced her spelling challenge, and you remember that time when you did the same and a little twinge of pride warms your heart knowing that the two of you shared the same path, then out of nowhere your right peck burst into a boob (right right boob deflated into a peck)? Yeah, stupid you! That was Slaanesh. So stop being proud of shit already, okay? Well, this is the story of Slaanesh and his/her rise to super stardom. So slip into those pants you have been wearing every day because your pride and self image is pretty low these days, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of..... what ever, it doesn't matter, and bask in the meh tones of Mob Rules!
Have you ever been in the middle of the Christmas Carol and realized that this is really just the story of burgeoning primarch making their way in the world without their father's guidance during the Christmas season? Me neither, that would be weird. But just in case you have we have a treat for you! Three Christmas movies transformed into 40K lore, plus our favorite this and thats, what we have been up to and all the other reasons we bother to record our dulcet tones. So get up, our yourself a nice tall tasty glass of honey bee extract in grass smoothie, put on your favorite dress that you bought that you only wear when nobody else is around to remind you of that time as a kid when your friends made you break into a dodgy strip club and you fell in love with the stripper on stage who wore one marginally like it but you want to recapture that sensation (What? No, YOU'RE weird!), sit back and delve into the occasionally historically accurate sounds of Mob Rules!
Do you like people who like sandwiches? Do you like people who like dead sandwiches? Do you like people that like dead sandwiches that have feelings and talk to you about when your mom used to make her pancakes? If so then this podcast is for you! Eldar: Warhammer 40K's sandwich eating elves are on a quest to talk to their dead moms through the portent of sandwiches as the quest for the perfect pumpkin pancake recipe. But instead of that perfect pumpkin pancake they find their past! But not really. But kinda, but not really, but.... no, they do. Who cares. It is elves. Dave and Jon delve deep into the Ghost Warrior book and spoil the shit out of it for you. So put on that Guardians of the Galaxy T-Shirt you have had for years with that one crusty spot around your lower abdomin that doesn't seem to come off no matter how many times you wash it, mix yourself a tall tasty glass of what ever frozen things are in the freezer, sit back and absorb the warm scandalous tones of Mob Rules!
What do 80's action heroes and Imperial Hives Cities have in common? That is for you to decide. See how nice we are? You are empowered now to write your own answers. We trust you.
This episode we delve into what it is like to live in a Hive city, the ins the outs and the unfortunate who gets turned into a toaster servitor. Then, we get into a 1980's action style 40K hero write up, taking vintage heroes and turning them into grim dark super heroes. Do you have somebody in mind?
Lets get into it. Put on your favorite indi-comic T-shirt from the 1990's with the moth bite holes along the waste line, mix up a nice tall tasty smoothy with the left over apples from that pie you made a few weeks ago, sit back and bask in the warm sounds of Mob Rules!
Who has time to read when social media needs to be updated 18 times a day, the kids need to be walked, the dog needs to do homework and the Raiders in the wasteland need to be murderized? For those of us who wish they had the time but don't, the Mob Rules crew brings you the Carrion Throne in it it's entire glory, each twist of fate, each untold truth so you do not have to turn a page. For those of you who have read it, this is your chance to relive your favorite moments with Crowl, Neva-Jeff, Spinoza and the whole Carrion Throne cast as we explore the story.
Put on your favorite Christmas sweater vest your old roomate made for you a few years ago, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of arguably expired Pumpkin flavored egg nog, sit back and titillate your mind with the enigmatic sounds of Mob Rules!
What do tiger stripes, quartered paint schemes and hands with glory holes have in common? No, it was not that Volkswagen Beetle you had in college. No, it was not the 1980's.... okay, maybe it kinda was the 1980's. The answer I was looking for was 'The Badab Wars." There is a lot of lore packed into this confrontation and a war that, even though it was written in the 1980's, is actually a pretty recent war in the scope of the 40K timeline. But who cares about that? We are just here for the dick jokes!
So, go pick out that shirt with the weird stain around the crotch that won't come out and you can't stop picking at as it slowly deteriorates the fabric, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of Pumpkin spice egg nog and bask in the NSFW sounds of Mob Rules!
Do you ever sit on your futon that you inhereted from the previous renter, staring out the window with those streaks that you can't get rid of no matter what you do and just think to yourself "why aren't there female space marines?" Of course not, because that is a dumb question, instead you thought "how do I find the female characters in the lore?" Thankfully we found the answer, and that was twitter! Thank you twitter. The lads mashed their brain boxes together to wrangle the ladies, mechanicus/um and get you all the news on ShadeSpire so that you didn't have to! Okay, that is a crap explanation, you really want to dredge it up for yourself, but I needed a good ending to that sentence and wasn't committed to rewriting the first 2/3s. Sorry.
Anyway, it is time to pour yourself a tall tasty mug of coffee, mix in some sugar free non-dairy creamer you accidentally picked up when you meant to buy sugary creamer, plop some barely expired cream cups in it, put on your favorite Millennium Falcon t-shirt with periwinkle paint splotches you can't explain and indulge in the super saturated sexy sounds of Mob Rules!
Long ago, I mean, long away, er, in the far future? Okay, that one. In the far future, in a land far away... hmmm, can I use "far" twice in once sentence? Seems a little weird, not too weird, but a little. Anyway, in the far future in a land far away on a planet covered in excess, there lived a family, much like your's or mine, rich beyond belief, running a solar system, each member plotting the demise of one another for control and fostering a mechanical, cloned abomination to succeed the throne, and everything continued on until a rag tag band of misfits in a Baneblade arrived. BOOK REVIEW TIME!!!! Been long awaited but we delve into Shadow Sword by Guy Haley and diznam, it is good!
So don your compact foam T'au cosplay suit, pour yourself a nice tall tasty glass of instant ice coffee and sit back and indulge in the rock hard sounds of Mob Rules!
Are you getting that impression that GW stealth released a new army, the Imperial Guard? Thanks to investigative journalism and four sets of keen eyes, we have uncovered the truth, that in fact the Imperial Guard go way back to the dawn of 40K!!! Thats right. In today's episode we uncover the truth about the guard, where they come from, why GW has been so secretive about them and what we see the future looking like for this undercover organization.
So put on your mom's favorite nightgown that she made 23 years ago, pour yourself a tall tasty glass of Metamucil, sit back and endulge in the ever informative sounds of Mob Rules!
The episode we break down the functions of a polynomial, the effects of a black crusade and what it means to be a gerbil in Hollywood. One of those things is true. Can you find the true statement? No calculators, only scratch paper now. We also talk about what happened to Phil and what the past 30 years have been like in the realm of 40k.
All that and not much else on MOB RULES!
In our first ever episode on Canadian monetary policy, Jon and Ted delve deep into the financial workings of the Canadian petrol industry. Well, sorta. Anecdotally through reference to once buying gas in the Yukon. That is pretty much the same as an in-depth look at monetary policy, right? Thankfully we have a deeper subject: PRIMARIS MARINES!!!!!! The lore, the tabletop roles, etc. Then we go into what it is to be older in our hobby, should we spend money or time? What tools do we employ to keep the flame burning. So, go to the liquor cabinet, pour yourself a nice tall tasty pint of Everclear, put on your favorite jeans with the twin holes between the crotch (remember to bring a blanket) and bask in the rotten tones of Mob Rules!
As Phil gets ready to head down the Al-Can we give him a bit of a handjob and courage him to talk about his beloved Dark Angels, the history, the organization, the why and how they became traitors. But, shhhhh, don't tell him, he is still in denial. We also go into the changing rule set, our favorite model kits and thank a fan for his home-made Jeff the Custodes.
So pour a medium glass of weeks old flat root beer, plop a couple scoops of generic brand ice cream, put on your tech conference hoodie you got 4 years ago, sit back and bask in the awesome sounds of Mob Rules.
the 1 Hour a Night facebook group was mentioned as hosting the Dark Imperium competition was it as the Warhammer 40000 page instead.Our Apologies to Alexander Good who ran the event.
Goge Vandire. What do you know about Goge Vandire and his brother Doge? Yeah, that is what I thought, not much. Lets get into it: he was a jerk, probably had a lil borderline personality issues, loved young girls, older girls too, and cheated on his taxes. Kind of a jerk really. BUT, he was an important jerk who was instrumental in creating the empire we all know and love... unless you don't love it, then it is the empire you know and do not love. Ya see? So, lets get into some Warhammer 40,000 lore with the Age of Apostasy!
Ever find yourself basking in the warm glow of the smog hanging over your hive world illuminated by the manufactorum over the ridge of spires while sipping that exotic recaf wondering to yourself how you got so lucky in your grim dark world just to have your feelings wrenched from your bliss unexpectantly, twisted sideways, the color of life swell and shudder turning quickly into darkness as you are left an empty husk of a human barely able to perform basic natural functions? If so thank an assassin! Chances are you were an unsanctioned psyker and the emperor is better off now. But don't just stop there, you memories of a life lost isn't the focus of this podcast, the focus is on the assassins from seven of the 12 temples as well as some other folks that like to play death dealer on their off hours. So go down to your local quickie mart, grab yourself a tall tasty recycled plastic bottle of Faygo, put on your favorite hip hop hoodie and bundle up with the boombastic sounds of Mob Rules!
The lads delve into the history of perhaps the most polarizing Space Marines chapter: the Ultramarines. In wa way the history of the history of the Space Marines is the History of the Ultramarines more so than any other chapter whether you love them or hate them. In a way the thing that makes them so interesting isn't who they are but the reaction towards them both in game and out.
Also this episode the eBay Price is Right is back! So pony up to the bar, order yourself a nice tasty glass of room-temperature Tang, haphazardly apply some torn pieces of napkin to your facial stubble and soak in the noxious sounds of Mob Rules!
There are times like these in our lives, where change, change takes us down that uncomfortable path, removes the familiar and and gives us uncertainty. We came to know 7th edition, it was our friend, our cousin, our loved one, 7th meant a lot of things to us. We escaped into her bosom when the dishes need be washed, a presentation in school had us stressed out, our partner wanted to talk to us about why you watch gory moves. 7th was our mistress, and at other times everything else became the mistress as 7th took first string. In those nights, when 7th had your full attention, and you made notes to yourself, when you had that aha moment seeing that by putting a techmarine on bike in your devastator squad and it conferred relentless to the rest of the lads, or when you realized that if the Iron Hands Librarian took Gorgon’s Chains, rolled endurance on their psychic power and pulled an extra plus one on their warlord trait you could effectively have a one plus feel no pain. Moments like that made you feel special, as though you looked into the heart of the universe and found that little secret, that leg up that nobody else knew about it made you feel like a king for a night. Or, maybe it was that day when you discovered that a bubble affect went off inside your rhino happy to think that you gave your transport a five up invulnerable save, your opponent disagreed, the two of you couldn’t find the specific rule so you rolled off on it and won. A week later you saw in a forum that the model is considered to be “removed form the table when embarked in the transport” and could not cast their bubble unless otherwise stated and you were crushed. We look at these things, a series of push and pull and we think “that is a bunch of crap! How dare GW ruin my army, I am never playing again” and the following week we are back down at our friend’s house with another list trying to avoid admitting that we were wrong all the while enjoying the game. These events, the push and pull that remind us of our love. The clerk at the fast food drive through doesn’t give us that push pull, they do not cause us to pause and think, they operate, we exchange, we eat we poop and we move on unfazed. But it is these rules, these models that cause us to debate whether or not Centurians are fluffy or a cheap shot at more money, months later as we try to figure out how we could magnetize their weapons and what they would look like as Obliterators. The love made 7th edition matter, and even though 7th edition passes today she will always matter.
Remember, this is not about death, but a life well lived.